I have heard so many people complain about the snow this week. We have a lot on the ground right now and a lot more to come, apparently. Funny thing is, these past few years, people complained that we hardly had a winter.

A few weeks ago, my granddaughters took their place at my bathroom mirror, standing patiently while I straightened their very curly hair. We talked about how they have such beautiful curly hair, but they want straight hair like Ama and Mom, and how I want their beautiful curly hair, but I am stuck with straight.

It’s kind of a thing with the human species. We always want what we don’t have. So today…

I am grateful I do not have curly hair that is always a tangle.

I am grateful that our town is covered in beautiful diamond white snow instead of dirty dusty.

I am grateful there are pieces of firewood dirt scattered all over the floor, because it means we have firewood and are using our fireplace in the midst of this winter wonderland.

I am grateful my clothes are too tight, because it just means I eat well.

I am grateful Sam has cancer and we have so much to pray about – it just makes us realize how little control we have and how big our God really is.

I am grateful that songs make me cry right now – it means I have a heart full of emotion.

I am grateful for interruptions in my busy work day so that I have to work longer or begin earlier. It just means that a granddaughter needed to text with me, my daughter needed to catch me up on life, or a friend needed to reach out for a few minutes.

I am grateful that our small town USA neighbors and friends have rallied with snow shoveling and meals and offers of assistance, even though it is so hard to admit we need some extra support – it means our circle is tightening and becoming formidable.

I am grateful to be overwhelmed and very behind on cards sent – it means we have been so very blessed by our larger circle of friends who send emails and letters and cards and remind us that our names are in their prayers.

And I am grateful for the “why us?” anger and the selfishness I feel for all the alone time I can get with Sam, sitting just beneath the surface. It is a reminder that I am of the human species and in need of a Savior and a whole lot of grace.

Last week, we took a trip. It was a spontaneous kind of trip that we planned about a month or so ago on a whim.

“Let’s go to San Antonio.”

Granted, there was an ulterior motive to help a dear friend who just purchased a home after her divorce. She had projects. Like honey to a fly, those projects they are, and Sam was salivating.

But so was Rhonda. San Antonio used to be home and it has been so long…there’s just no place like home.

So, we bought plane tickets, made the arrangements, packed a suitcase of clothes and another suitcase full of tools, and on Thursday afternoon, we drove the 5 hours to Denver to fly to my “home away from home.”

There is nothing quite like going home. There is nothing quite like seeing an old friend and reconnecting like it was yesterday. There is nothing quite like going from single digit temperatures to mid-60’s and 70’s sunshine.

I am certain I was a little annoying in the rental car. “I remember THIS!” “Oh, look at that building – that’s new.” “There’s where the girls had birthday parties.” “It’s so strange seeing these street names again!” Bittersweet it all was – San Antonio was my favorite place in the whole wide world…

I am grateful for Mexican restaurants at Market Square.

I am grateful for a beautiful family who welcomed us with open arms and let Sam play with a drill.

I am grateful for those things that remain the same and make San Antonio such a charming city.

I am grateful for fresh, ouch-ouch-ouch-those-are-hot-tortillas, rolled up with melted butter, even if they made me feel and look like I gained 10 pounds.

I am grateful for beautiful blue skies, mariachi musicians, and a warm stroll through the King William District on a Sunday afternoon.

I am grateful for a husband who doesn’t mind handing over the keys and riding in the passenger seat for the day so that I can drive all over the place and feel some independence.

I am grateful for hand-holding, for soft conversation over a late lunch about such a wonderful weekend getaway, for a husband who doesn’t just talk about doing things but does them, for quiet moments of watching him take it all in, for the time we have, just the two of us.

I am grateful for moments like this that happened as we were waiting to board the plane to go back home on Sunday evening:

“Dallas flight 2467 passenger, Tony Romo, please come to Gate A11 for boarding.”

The entire terminal looked up and directly at Gate A11, where we were seated. I must admit, I was a little curious and slightly excited we might be flying with a celebrity.

5 minute pause.

“Dallas flight 2467 passenger, Tony Romo, please come to Gate A11 for boarding.”

Another long pause.

“Last call for passenger Tony Romo, flight 2467 to Dallas.”

A little shorter pause.

“Well…I guess he’s a no-show like he was in the playoffs.”

And then you heard the groans and uproarious laughter up and down the halls.  It made us smile as we watched the various airport circus acts walk by, waiting to board.

We eventually arrived back in Denver, wincing at the frigid temperatures and wishing our weekend was a day or several longer. We were so tired, but it was a happy, fulfilled tired. Sam was anxious to sleep in his own bed, so even though it was 11 pm before we could see the Denver airport in our rear view mirror, we headed east in the dark of a Sunday night.

When we arrived home early on Monday morning, we were greeted with concrete.

I am grateful for concrete, at least I am in this circumstance.

I am grateful for neighbors and friends unknown who thought of us and shoveled and moved piles of snow so that a 5 am arrival was welcoming.

There’s just no place like home.

Finally, I am grateful for more memories made with Sam.

Everyone should do a Dorothy and be spontaneous every once in awhile. Visit the place you love with the one(s) you love. Don’t wait. You may never pass this way again.

I am grateful for the sound I hear just outside my upstairs window while I work, sound of snow melt off the side of a very old home in the glorious sunshine of a beautiful February day.

I am grateful when the bread I make turns out better than expected.

I am grateful for anticipation of a fun weekend in San Antonio.

And I am grateful for memories, both good and bad. They have had a part in who I am.

I am grateful for angels in our life right now.

I know there are angels all around us. I believe in God’s unseen army. I am certain that as we travel, we are spared tragedy as the tires slip on patches of ice. I am certain as I sit here in my home on a daily basis and work at my desk, that I am spared devastation from a short in a wire or a spark of a fire. I am certain that as we go about our routine lives, there are countless prayers answered because someone thought of us and lifted us up to our Father and He answers with rescue and with unseen protection.

I am also certain He answers those prayers with the army of angels we can see. I believe, because I am Thomas, the one who sees, the one who feels, the one who is shown on a daily basis so that I do not doubt His presence.

These angels might be:

• a sister who calls and leaves a happy voicemail.
• a friend who checks in with us on an almost daily basis and was worried about our travels this past weekend.
• a brother who keeps us updated with his latest bathroom project.
• an oldest sister named Anissa who took charge and braided her sisters’ hair when Ama was too busy to take the time.
• friends who inform us that church is canceled due to icy roads.
• a devotion sent to me by my soul sister.
• a wonderful neighbor who shares their Wi-Fi password when our internet goes down.
• a person who asks how the caregiver/care worrier is doing.
• text messages from the January cooks that make me smile as they continually ding my phone with happy conversation among them.
• a little 5-year-old Anjalie who wasn’t directed but just marched right in and started helping load furniture on a frigid and icy day.
• a Dad who is “okay, but I’ll get over it,” and always makes me smile.
• a friend who sends the perfect text messages and emails at just the right time because God laid us on her heart and knew her message would resonate.
• an Oklahoma friend who sees a great card and sends it to us because “it fits.”
• a sister and brother-in-law who took an entire day to entertain our grandchildren and give Sam an afternoon of rest.
• people who post thoughtful messages of encouragement and support on CaringBridge.
• a pleasant DirecTV technician.
• friends who understand why I do not respond and love me anyway.
• an unknown blogger who seems like a friend and takes my current crisis and throws it to the wind so that I can focus on something else and laugh for a few minutes.
• four grandchildren who left remnants of themselves all over the house by way of a lone sock, a hair tie, a colored page, fingerprints, evidence of boredom through homemade Valentines and snowflakes, and the most beautiful “made by granddaughters” sugar cookies, so that I may constantly be reminded how very blessed I am.

I stumbled upon this poem yesterday, and I haven’t been able to get it out of my mind. I think I should memorize it.

You have to believe in happiness

“You have to believe in happiness,
Or happiness never comes.
I know that a bird chirps none the less
When all that he finds is crumbs.

You have to believe the buds will blow,
Believe in the grass in the days of snow.
Ah, that’s the reason a bird can sing,
On his darkest day he believes in Spring.

You have to believe in happiness—
It isn’t an outward thing.
The Spring never makes the song, I guess,
As much as the song the Spring.

Aye, many a heart could find content
If it saw the joy on the road it went,
The joy ahead when it had to grieve,
For the joy is there—but you have to believe.”

—Douglas Malloch (1877–1938)

I am grateful for birds that sing.

I am grateful that if I have to be away from home, at least I am here in a place that I love.

I am grateful when an elevator works, but I am also grateful for stairs that exercise my stagnant self.

I am grateful for a tv remote control. And more than 3 channels. And color. And an end to that rolling annoyance that used to be – I don’t even know what it’s called, but anyone under 45 years of age has no clue what I speak of, I am certain. But I do miss the fascination I used to have with the record player arm that just knew how to raise up and lower down on a record and find the right groove.

I am grateful I grew up before all this technology became the norm.

I am grateful that I can choose not to listen to unsolicited advice.

I am grateful for Chinese food, delivered, on a freezing rain kind of day.

I am grateful for messages that seem to fit exactly what my heart needs to hear in the moment.

The joy I give you transcends your circumstances. This means that no matter what is happening in your life, it is possible to be joyful in Me. The prophet Habakkuk listed a series of dire circumstances that he was anticipating, then he proclaimed, “Yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my Savior.” This is transcendent joy!

I am training you to view your life from a heavenly perspective – through eyes of faith. When things don’t go as you had hoped, talk with Me. Seek My Face and My Guidance. I will help you discern whether you need to work to change the situation or simply accept it. Either way, you can teach yourself to say, “I can still rejoice in YOU, Jesus.” This short statement of faith – expressing your confidence in Me – will change your perspective dramatically. As you practice doing this more and more, your Joy will increase. This training also prepares you to handle the difficulties awaiting you on your pathway toward Heaven. Rejoice in Me, always. – from Sarah Young’s, “Jesus Always,” February 5 (emphasis by Rhonda)

I am grateful for new shoes that I really like.

I am grateful for a friend who listens and doesn’t mind the ugly unload.

I am grateful for others like me who wear it all on their sleeve.

I am grateful for flowers in winter.

I am grateful for memories of Mom’s hot chocolate mix…the stuff with powdered milk and powdered sugar. Mmmmmm.

I am grateful for anticipation of a great night of basketball. Who in the world am I. I do not recognize my old self…

I am grateful that I always have a to-do list.

I am grateful that bills are paid and there is still money in the bank to give to others.

Finally, I am grateful for the word, “yet.” Even though, I will. In spite of, I will.  Yet, I will reJOYce in the Lord.

Like the poem says. The JOY is there…you just have to believe.

Life is not intended to be simply a round of work,
no matter how interesting and important that work may be.
A moment’s pause to watch the glory of a sunrise or a sunset is soul satisfying, while a bird’s song will set the steps to music all day long.
– Laura Ingalls Wilder

I have days when I am quiet.

I have words that are battling to escape from my brain and my mouth, but I also have sense to do a “Delmar” and just remain quiet. For many years, my mom spoke for my dad, while he remained quiet. I am sure he had much to say, but he had the sense to keep the words inside.

The past few days have been a battle inside, and I am grateful for the sense to keep the words inside.

Yesterday, I drove all afternoon, and Saturday we drove all afternoon. Approximately 750 miles this past weekend. I like the feeling of road noise and peace as the miles go by. I sometimes imagine in my head as I drive, “No one in the world knows exactly where I am in this moment…” When we are driving at night and I sit in the passenger seat, I like to watch for houses with a lamp on, imagining the peaceful and quiet evening happening on the inside and wishing I was at home with an accent light and a sherpa throw draped over me.

I am grateful for good tires, a clean car, and a tank of gas.

I had the privilege of talking to my baby girl for over an hour on Saturday. I cannot remember the last time I had an hour long conversation with my baby girl. That makes me sad all at the same time I feel inexpressible joy that I had an hour long conversation with my baby girl.  I would love to have recorded the call, just so I could hear her voice over and over again.

I am grateful for a phone call that brought inexpressible joy.

As we were driving on Saturday, there were many, many miles of quiet awe. It was fascinating to explore a part of the country I knew nothing of – where roads were few and ranches were marked by brands. The only signs of life were the angus that dotted the landscape and the hawks that soared above us. In a previous form of myself, it would have caused tired eyes and a road nap. But now, I want to take it all in. I want to see and appreciate the beauty of the quiet, the inspiration of that which I do not know.

I am grateful for the figurative and literal road less traveled.

I have days when I am quiet.

It might be that my soul is anguished about something in particular. It might be that it is just a female rite of passage that causes emotions to be extra tender. It might be that there is a settling of acceptance of the way things are.

Or it might sometimes be that there is joy that is unspeakable.

I am grateful for quiet days, whatever may be the cause.

It is good to proclaim My Love in morning and My Faithfulness at night. Proclaiming this love is exceedingly good for you. When you declare the wonders of My Loving Presence, you are strengthened and encouraged. This glorious blessing flows into you more fully as you speak these words out loud. Let this delightful declaration fill you with joy inexpressible and full of glory!

Ponder some of the qualities of My Amazing Love: It is sacrificial, unfailing, priceless, boundless – reaching to the heavens. It shines so brightly that it can carry you through your darkest days. When you get to the end of each day, it is time to proclaim My Faithfulness that reaches to the skies. Look back over the day, and notice how I helped you navigate your way through it. The more difficulties you encountered, the more help I made available to you. It is good to give voice to My Great Faithfulness, especially at night, so that you can lie down and sleep in peace.  – From Sarah Young’s “Jesus Always,” February 4