A woman’s mind is a complicated mess, like a grocery store display that gets bumped by a rogue shopping cart manned by a 2 year old. Okay, maybe not a woman’s mind. Maybe just mine.

We try to do the right thing. Sometimes we err. Err is the kind way of saying, “screw up.” This week, a few things have happened to us that have been a “Holy Spirit gentle reminder” to point the finger at ourselves rather than at others.

Case in points:

• Someone hung up on Sam when he just wanted to ask a question. Granted, the relationship was tender, but still. The hang up didn’t feel good. And now, Sam will not continue that business relationship.
• A text message sent with a kind and thoughtful message to our loved ones went unnoticed, or at least unanswered.
• A special date on the calendar wasn’t acknowledged, and my tender feelings were hurt.
• Someone closest to us has not mentioned our current journey. Silence isn’t silence – it speaks volumes.
• An unpleasant and disparaging comment about us was made on the other end of the phone while the oblivious was unaware they had answered the phone call and we were listening.

All of these things weigh a lot. My shoulders droop with the trivial but real heartache. And then there is a little pin prick, a little irritation in my conscience…

1. How many times have I read a text message and not responded at the very least, to let the sender know I heard their sentiment? It might be that I was right in the middle of something or I didn’t have time for the back and forth, but still.
2. How many times have I been so busy I let an important date pass me by without sending my love to someone?
3. How many times have I listened to a voicemail but that was all I did? I should have offered the courtesy of a reply call…
4. How many times have I not known what to say, so I remained silent, avoided, rather than reach out?
5. How many times have I spoken critically of someone, but by the grace of God, my phone had not accidentally called someone on its own at that moment?
6. How many times have I thought, “I need to call just to see how they are doing,” but I haven’t done so?

Today, I am grateful for heart checks.

As the Holy Spirit and Sam so often remind me: We are better than this. We must do better…