There is a city of roly polies in the bathroom on the first floor this week. The floor is tiny-tiled, so it looks like the 4,367 bugs are little Volkswagens driving on roads and meeting in intersections. And by mid-afternoon, there are multiple accidents on the roads and the tow trucks have not yet arrived to remove the debris.

I’m hungry.

Recently, my feelings were stung by comments about ham salad. I didn’t even make the ham salad. I just delivered it as a token gift from my boss to my family members. He thought they would like it as much as he does. But they didn’t. And they poked fun about the ham salad and my insistence they try it to the point it was a big joke to everyone in the room. And I felt bad for my boss. And I felt like the 11-year-old at the dance who is the laughing stock but laughs along with everyone else to cover up the sting. I’m 52 years old and had hurt feelings over a dish of ham salad. Still trying to grow up…

Why can I never finish a book?

I really, really, really dislike being scared. When someone comes up behind me and says, “Boo!” I seriously have an internal meltdown. Why do people think that is so funny? It isn’t funny. It’s mean. I used to be the “BOO!-er,” but over the years as I have become more mature and wise, I have repented of my ways and wouldn’t do that intentionally to anyone else. That stomach in the throat feeling is not fun. That keeps me away from rollercoasters, too. Who needs to ride a rollercoaster anyway? Or bungee jump? WHY, people. It’s the same feeling as sitting in the darkness watching any of the “Saw” movies or Criminal Minds. WHY, people. Fill your minds with goodness. Treat your people with “Excuse me’s” rather than “Boo! I’m right behind you!”

Is it possible for me to go a week without my phone? But if I didn’t have my phone, how would I take pictures of roly-polies in the bathroom?!

I could use a winning lottery ticket so I could get some new clothes for our trip and rugs for the white house and all the greeting cards on Etsy and back-to-school clothes for granddaughters and new shoes for me and take Sam out for his birthday and order good water for the white house and put a down payment on a new place for Dad and wash the car and pay off the Home Depot bill and –

It is joy unspeakable and full of glory, full of glory, full of glory it is joy unspeakable and full of glory, oh the half has never yet been told!

I never knew baby powder on a greasy food drip would take care of a stain. If only I had all those shirts I’ve thrown out.

I wonder if those cookies are still in the conference room. If they are there when I go check on the Volkswagens, I’m grabbing one.

Karissa just sent me pictures of their visit two weeks ago. I have GOT to lose weight. I wonder if that food is still stuck to the front porch. That snake looks like poop. Awww, that piggy. I miss my kids. All 13 of them, in Texas and in Washington.

I am grateful that my brain is a little goofy. It sure makes the day go faster. Nights are longer, but days go faster.

And I am grateful my brain does not resemble this.