I am grateful that I will see my counselor this evening.

I am grateful for Mom’s pastel-colored deviled eggs, although I have never eaten one. They were always a tradition on the Easter table, and they will be on the table on Sunday, too, just for my Dad (and anyone else in the family who likes deviled eggs.)

I think I need to make these, too:

I am grateful for a daughter who sounds happy and for random, “nothing in general” phone conversations with her once again.

I am grateful for people who send handwritten notes and cards in the mail.

I am calling you to a life of thankfulness. I want all your moments to be punctuated with thanksgiving. The basis for your gratitude is My sovereignty. I am the Creator and Controller of the universe. Heaven and earth are filled with My glorious Presence.

When you criticize or complain, you are acting as if you think you could run the world better than I do. From your limited human perspective, it may look as if I’m mismanaging things. But you don’t know what I know or see what I see. If I pulled back the curtain to allow you to view heavenly realms, you would understand much more. However, I have designed you to live by faith, not by sight. I lovingly shield you from knowing the future or seeing into the spirit world. Acknowledge My sovereignty by giving thanks in all circumstances.

I am so grateful for my Dad today.  This morning, I was reminded of our conversation we had this past weekend that began with him wanting to remember how difficult it was for my Mom to breathe in her last two years here. The way he remembers? He climbs all nine flights of stairs leading up to the apartment.  He has begun to do this on a daily basis again, not only to remember her pain, but it’s wonderful exercise for him, as well. And the added benefit was revealed at his doctor appointment last week – a normal blood pressure reading. I am so grateful my Dad is physically active, still works full time, wants to remember Mom in this way, and shares his stories with us. And I am grateful for a normal blood pressure reading.

I am grateful for my pastor.

I am grateful for a little girl named Sienna who now helps me at Bingo on Tuesday evenings.

I am grateful for pay day.

I am grateful for an abundance of awesome devotions today – so I am including two of them in my grateful so that I do not forget their message. This one is from my church devotions, as we read through Luke, this morning from chapter 22, when Peter denied Christ and failed as His follower and disciple:

…Peter failed.  The man who many consider the head disciple failed in being a disciple.    This is one of a select few stories that appear in all Four Gospels.   Each Gospel was written between 70 and 95 AD, years after Peter was a legend as the rock upon which Jesus will build his church.  Each church that received a copy of the Gospels would have known the “Peter the Brave” and the “Peter the Foundation” version.  They would have been shocked by this Scripture showing Peter’s weakness.

How would anyone ever have learned about what happened in that dark area outside of Jesus’ prison that night?    Peter must have told them.  Peter must have told others about this specific failing for it to be picked up by all the Gospel writers.

Peter failed, then he told the story of his failure as the event where he found God’s forgiveness.

So, what do we do with this particular Scripture?

We fail like Peter.   When we fail, we tell others about it.

As a personal example, I fail as a disciple of Jesus.   I fail to always read Scripture primarily for my soul and instead tend to read it for how it applies to others’ souls.  I struggle loving people who remind me of certain high school friends.  I draw healthy boundaries, but sometimes what I perceive as a “healthy boundary” was simply an excuse not to do something.  I fail, more than you might want a pastor to admit.  Reading this Scripture, I decided to fail like Peter and share it with you.

This week, I suggest you try failing like Peter too.  See if you have an easier time talking to someone about Faith if you begin with a specific example of a time when you failed.   Announce how you are in need of grace like everyone else and see how that changes the conversation.

You don’t have to be perfect to be a disciple of Jesus. – Rev. Steven Blair

I am grateful that I am a failure, saved by Grace. My sins have been shared with the world, and I survived the shame and guilt. I am “one of those people” now, and I can tell you confidently, I would MUCH rather be on this side of that line. Because this is where I find Jesus. He loves me as I am, right here, dirt, grime, sins and all. He thinks I was worth dying for. I may have lost some friends and family in the process of failure, but I gained my life and a relationship with my Lord, my Savior, my God. And for that, I am imperfect and grateful.

I am grateful for a nice mattress.

I am grateful for time spent with Cindy and Keith on Saturday.

I am grateful for memories of the little house.

I am grateful that not every day is like this.

I am grateful that computers and Microsoft Word include a delete button.

I am also grateful that Word has an undo button.

I am grateful for an email from Geri.

I am grateful for a piano to play when I am alone.

I am grateful for the beauty of the daffodils outside the building that were soaking up the sunshine this morning.

I am grateful for a car to drive.

I am grateful that Sam took care of tax day.

And I am especially grateful today for this short clip from Sunday’s message:

Into Thy hands, I commit my spirit.

I don’t understand.  It is hard for me to fathom that as I sit at the piano in the rehearsal room, I can look out at the 60+ kids holding their music and practicing and think that one of them will be shot and killed by a former KKK Grand Dragon at the young age of 14. That isn’t in my realm of reality. That is a scene from a movie, a chapter from a book of fiction, a nightmare that should be forgotten at daybreak.

But it isn’t a scene from a movie or a chapter of fiction. It IS in this realm of reality, because we live in a broken world. It DID happen to one of those who sat in that rehearsal room. No one is immune to violence and evil.

I am grateful for my devotions this morning from Luke 21 and grateful for this message included:

…Holy Week is not a perfunctory set of days on a calendar. Holy Week is living testimony. It prepares us with the assurance that in the middle of our darkness, the light of the world is at work.

“Now when these things begin to happen, look up and lift up your heads, because your redemption draws near.” Luke 21:28. 

The testimony of Holy Week is that darkness does fall – but we must turn our eyes to the light that is coming on Sunday. Jesus is the LIGHT that wins out over darkness forever and ever. Amen.

I am grateful for the reminder today of the skit my choir kids used to do with candles and the song, “This Little Light of Mine.” Four or five students would stand side-by-side on the stage, each holding a lit candle, singing the song. One at a time, they would be overcome with temptation, or doubt, or shame…and they would blow their candle out and bow their heads. When the last student was left with a lit candle and was in danger of being affected by the “world,” he/she would begin to sing louder and louder, and then lit the candle of the next classmate, who would then join back in and sing, sharing the light with the next classmate, until they were all letting their light shine once again, singing loudly and without shame. It always gave me goosebumps and brought tears to my eyes. A very effective message…

I am grateful, that in the midst of tragedy, there is reason to hope.

I am grateful, that in the midst of tragedy, there is good to be found. It’s Friday, but Sunday’s coming.

I am grateful for tragic events like this that slap me in the face and make me realize how much more I should be grateful, that life is too short, and I never know how much time I have, so I cannot hold back in telling those I love how much I love them.

I am grateful to have a relationship with Jesus. I cannot imagine facing tragedy with no hope.

And I am once again grateful for the message my pastor brings every year at this time:  The worst thing is never the last thing.

I am grateful for ice cubes.

I am grateful for doors on bathroom stalls in women’s restrooms. These are a luxury I take for granted on a daily basis. However, even though they provide wonderful privacy among sane and respectful adults, a door on a stall does not prevent children from curiosity. I will never forget being in a public restroom with Amanda and Nanette, and a not-so-little boy about 6-7 years old decided to peek into the stalls. I was MORTIFIED. And his less-than-strict Mom just nonchalantly said, “Stop it, Joey.” I wanted to SCREAM. Amanda and I got the biggest kick out of the incident for so long afterwards and would “peek” into the spaces of the doors every time either of us happened to be on the other side, just so we could hear the other one say, “Stop it, Joey!” I miss Amanda and Nanette.

I am grateful for flannel pajama pants.

This is the day that I have made. Rejoice and be glad in it. Begin the day with open hands of faith, ready to receive all that I am pouring into this brief portion on your life. Be careful not to complain about anything, even the weather, since I am the Author of your circumstances. The best way to handle unwanted situations is to thank Me for them. This act of faith frees you from resentment and frees Me to work My ways into the situation, so that good emerges from it.

To find Joy in this day, you must live within its boundaries. I knew what I was doing when I divided time into twenty-four hour segments. I understand human frailty, and I know that you can bear the weight of only one day at a time. Do not worry about tomorrow or get stuck in the past. There is abundant Life in My Presence today.

I am grateful for my mid-morning snack  and the unexpected pleasure of unsalted peanuts and celery, together, that gives just a hint of celery/peanut butter taste, which spurred wonderful memories of lunchtime at CBA.

And I am grateful (allow me one of these to just childishly imagine this), that Mom now has a squirrel from our backyard to play with in Heaven.

I am grateful that God is creating, HAS created, a heart in me that is clean and covered in grace.

I am grateful to know that my CASA child will be a teenager and that I will begin this journey in June. Getting closer to our meeting day…

I am grateful for the sweetest video of my granddaughter I’ve ever seen. I can’t quit watching this. I just want to “squeeze her guts out,” as Mom would say: 

Anissa tells a story

Her mom has no idea where this came from, but it’s something about a wolf upstairs wanting to eat Andrae and Annistan, and she must save Annistan…and then at the end, you hear her say “The end!” I’m guessing it’s her version of Little Red Riding Hood or The Three Little Pigs, Collins style. 

I am grateful for a letter from Aunt Patsy that included pictures of my Mom, Karissa and I at Dan & Candice’s wedding.  Oh, I miss my Mom so much this week.

I am grateful for my Mom’s sewing kit that I happened to remember was in the closet this morning. I opened it, saw the material that she bought to make a blanket for Parker, and I sat on the floor upstairs and cried. It was a good, healing cry, but it made me so sad. I am grateful that I have this memory of Mom…

I am grateful for an unused computer tower that was sitting in the office that now belongs on the desk at home. I am grateful for my boss who insisted on giving it to us.

I am grateful for a friendly neighbor who came to help set up the computer.

I am grateful that I had enough gumption in me this morning to move the squirrel in the live trap on the patio so that the neighbors don’t call PETA on us, I didn’t get my fingers chewed off by the panicked rat with a cuter outfit, and I was able to go to work and leave the poor thing in prison without setting up “Free the Rotten Rodent” camp outside the door.  

And I am grateful for this story from my devotions this morning:

When in Rome…do as the tourists do. At least that’s what my three friends and I were doing. At our first stop on our backpacking trip through Italy, we picked out the highlights from the travel book – the Vatican, the Coliseum, the Forum, and we were now in search for what the book called a “grotesque monument” dedicated to Victor Emmanuel.

I didn’t know what to expect, but in a Ripley’s Believe it or Not kind of way, I couldn’t wait to see this “grotesque monument.” I pictured a giant head of Victor Emmanuel with a bulging forehead or maybe a statue of a man with blood dripping down his face.

We knew we were close. According to the map, it was located somewhere near this humongous white building.

We started on one side of the building, but didn’t see anything there. We thought maybe we were on the wrong side, so we took the long walk across the building to the other side. Not there either.  Maybe at the back? Nope. Not there. Did we miss it on the first side? We better check. Or maybe it was in the front? Our tired legs circled the mammoth building again and again, going down intersections and looking behind buildings. After spending an exasperating hour on the hunt, we finally stopped to ask someone to point us in the right direction.

“Go straight down this road about a block,” the kind stranger said.

“Which side of the giant white building is it on?”

With You stupid American radiating from his eyes, the stranger answered – “It is the giant white building.”

I’ve never wanted to swear so badly in a foreign language. How could we have missed it?!! We spent an hour looking for something that was right in front of us this whole time!!

This past incident makes me think about our search to find ways to live out our faith. Is it possible that this quest resembles us circling a big, white building.

We wonder if we have a bigger purpose – while we’re circling the big, white building.

We see others making a difference – while we’re circling the big, white building.

We pray that God will show us how to love – while we’re circling the big, white building.

Circling. Circling. Circling.

But what if we stopped our maddening loop – stopped looking for ways in which we think we can live out our faith and look at the building right in front of us.

What does your big, white building look like? Well… what has God already placed in your life th­­­­­at can be used for a grander purpose? Maybe it’s the neighbors you hardly know who you could invite over for dinner. Or your graphic design skills put to use for a worthy non-profit. The unlimited texts on your phone to send quick, encouraging messages. Your job connections for those in desperate, financial need. Maybe God wants to take an ugly past experience and use it to bring beauty to broken lives.

We’re totally missing it if we think God is waiting to give us ways to live into His purpose. He isn’t holding back that joy or reserving it for others. He’s given us skills, experiences, passions, resources, and gifts that can have eternal and everlasting impact. We need to stop playing ring-around-the-building, and not overlook the opportunities right in front of us.

 

One of my favorite songs ever:

Search Me

It’s a good life.

I am grateful for grease on the pole.  Last night at Bingo, I shared our squirrel dilemma with the group, and when I told them that I was going to have to bring the bird feeders down off the pole, Louene piped up and said, “Well, grease the pole!” She had learned this trick from her quilting ladies. So, this morning, we didn’t have grease or Crisco, but we did have some vegetable  oil, so I rubbed some up and down the metal pole and before I left for work, I was entertained by a very unique circus! Two squirrels were attempting to reach the feeders and would get halfway up the pole, only to slide right back down. And then they would scamper across the patio like a cat with scotch tape on its paws! “What is on my feet?!”

It was such a funny, fun beginning to my day, and I loved finally getting one over them!

I am grateful for the smell of my shampoo and conditioner, fresh-baked bread, diesel, frying bacon, a hardware store, musk, a clean baby, the wafting scent of just fried French fries as we walk by Wendy’s, a big fat poster marker, and clothes that have been dried with dryer sheets.

I am grateful for the simple goodness of an egg for breakfast.

I am grateful for six pounds gone.

And I am grateful that even though there are so many awful things happening in this world, and so many issues that seem to divide those I love and care about, I can rest on the fact that I’m just temporarily here, this is not home, and I don’t have to be the judge and jury. It’s all out of my hands, and I have peace knowing that I belong to the King, and one day soon, He’ll take me HOME home.

I belong to the King; I’m a child of His love,
I shall dwell in His palace so fair,
For He tells of its bliss in yon Heaven above,
And His children in splendor shall share.

I belong to the King; I’m a child of His love,
And he never forsaketh His own.
He will call me some day to His palace above;
I shall dwell by His glorified throne.

I belong to the King, and He loves me I know,
For His mercy and kindness so free
Are unceasingly mine wheresoever I go,
And my refuge unfailing is He.

I belong to the King, and His promise is sure:
That we all shall be gathered at last
In His kingdom above, by life’s waters so pure,
When this life with its trials is past.

How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the strong – because someday in life you will be all of these. – George Washington Carver

I am grateful for sounds of robins waking up very early in the morning.

I am grateful for John Pinette. He died on Saturday, and he was my favorite comedian. I am grateful for his sense of humor and ability to make me laugh at everything he said and did. He brought happiness to the world.

I am grateful for loose pants!! This drastic change in diet, along with drinking a gallon of water and exercise IS WORKING! I am grateful that we are eating much better. And I am grateful for the kickstart from Karissa to motivate and challenge us.

I am grateful for a funny partner to share life with. He is so quick-witted and makes me laugh many times a day.

I am grateful that Hobby Lobby puts their holiday items on sale before the holiday, although most of it is still too expensive for Bingo prizes.

I am grateful for the reminder this morning that when I feel distant from God, I should look inward for the cause, and all I have to do is whisper the name of Jesus, and He is right here.

And I am grateful for sea salt.

I am grateful for graham crackers. What a simple, wonderful snack. Graham cracker crusts, s’mores, Golden Grahams, first snacks for babies, and one of my favorites: graham crackers dipped in a glass of milk. Mmmmmmmm. I used to feel like I’d “won the lottery” when Mom would splurge and buy a box of cinnamon and sugar graham crackers!

I am grateful for Sam, for absurd experiences that are so ridiculous they make me laugh and squirm at the same time, and for visions of “Call of the Wildman.” Have you ever seen that show? It’s a toothless guy who’s nickname is Turtleman, and he is an exterminator of larger creatures – he removes raccoons and snakes and other creatures from people’s homes and then releases them into the wild, choosing to free them rather than harm them. And he does it with his bare hands. And when he succeeds, he yells, “Woo woo woo! Live action!”

Last night, we were sitting down to a long-awaited meal of a really good steak from the grill with a side of peas and carrots and a large salad. Oh, that first bite tasted so good. And then, we heard a small scratchy kind of noise. We dismissed it as the garbage disposal groaning at having just been used, although it was a far-fetched idea, but we were hungry and took that second bite of the amazing steak. And then we heard little feet scampering above the kitchen sink. And then we heard more scratching and what sounded like knawing noises. Talk about an end to an appetite and a wonderful dinner…

The following 30 minutes were spent figuring out what to do to stop this squirrel who had invaded the attic and slipped down the side of the house, INSIDE, and was now trapped in the “empty cavity” above the cupboards and sink of the kitchen. Sam called his handyman friend who had just sat down for dinner but offered a sounding board for Sam’s ideas to remove this furry invader of all things peaceful and pleasant, and after I realized that help was not on its way – I was going to have to assist in this extermination/removal, we got down to business. Well, SAM got down to business. I sort of watched and sighed and worried a little. We shut all of the doors in the house, just in case the varmint got loose, and then proceeded to hang a sheet and “seal” it with a staple gun. Sam went outside, opened the kitchen windows, and removed the can light above the sink before stepping down off the ladder and instructing me to bang a pan on the wall to try to scare the rascal out. As he was making his way back inside to protect me from an escape artist, the little rat with a furry tail plopped down onto the sheet and made his getaway out the window to freedom.

Talk about absurd and ridiculous and hilarious and AWFUL. I was grateful for no squirrels in the house, for a husband who knew what to do, and for silence in place of scampering.

And then we sat down and enjoyed the remainder of what WAS a delicious HOT meal. Who needs Turtleman? Not I, says the squirmy lady with a pan in one hand and Sam by her side. Cute outfit or not, the rat has to go.

Woo woo woo! Live action!

I am grateful for a beautiful card from Delores I received this weekend. Inside were three pictures – one of my Dad’s work truck, one of my Dad’s gas station, and one of Mom, Katrina, and I sitting at a table at a scrapbook store working on a surprise scrapbook/photo album for Karissa’s high school graduation. What beautiful memories, and what a wonderful, dear friend to have sent them to me along with words of encouragement and blessings. I love you, Delores!

I am grateful that we’ve made it through seven days without spending a penny at a restaurant or fast food drive through or at a convenience store for anything other than fuel. I am grateful that we have made it through seven days of eating only fruits and vegetables and lean meat. I am grateful that I have made it through seven days of drinking nothing but water and lots of it. I am sure I have downed more water in seven days than I had in six months, and that is not an exaggeration.

~~~~~

I am grateful for yesterday’s message at church. We are reading through Luke during Lent, and the messages have been focused on the book being about the “Gospel of the Nobodies.” Yesterday was focused on those we consider “less than.” Those who are homeless, down and out, below our “social or economic class…” This story was part of my morning devotions that coincide with daily readings from Luke, and it made me cry:

Several years ago, my family and I were in New York City visiting my brother-in-law. We had a wonderful time seeing Broadway shows, eating at fun and unique delicatessens, shopping Fifth Avenue and more. One afternoon, we were walking around Times Square when we came across a middle-aged African-American man who was holding a sign that read “Homeless – Please Help”. Our youngest daughter, Victoria, was around 7 years old at the time. She was walking between her mom (Lisa) and me, and our other two girls were walking behind us with their beloved uncle.

As we got closer to the man, I noticed that Victoria kept staring at him. I was just about to have a parent moment and tell her that staring was rude when she suddenly stopped and said, “I want to help him.” Of course, I was concerned about this proposition on multiple levels. I tried to explain to Victoria why trying to help him was not a good idea. If we gave him money, he might use it to buy alcohol or drugs. Besides, there were local churches, charities, and government agencies that could assist him. We also didn’t know anything about his story or his state of mind and approaching him was probably not a safe choice.

Victoria would have none of it. She was intent on doing something to help and she said, “If I can’t give him money, then what can I do?” I looked at Lisa like a deer caught in the headlights. Here I was, a pastor, trying to talk our strong-willed, tough as nails, sweet as sugar, compassion-filled daughter out of doing something right out of the “What Would Jesus Do” handbook. What was I thinking?

Lisa spoke first, “Well, you could buy him something to eat and give it to him. There’s a deli on the corner. Would you like to go and pick something out?” This was one of the many times in my life that I was thankful that I married “up.” Though I was still concerned about safety, this was a reasonable, workable plan.

Victoria entered the deli, and within 60 seconds keyed in on the fruit. “I would like to buy him an apple. Do I have enough money left to do that?” We told her she did and Lisa took a well crinkled envelope with “Victoria” written on it out of her purse and handed it to her. Victoria took the apple up to the clerk, paid for it, got her change, and gave the envelope back to Lisa.

We told Victoria that we weren’t sure how the man would react. He might say thank you, he might get mad and say mean things, or he might do something in between. We just didn’t know. We told Victoria that regardless of what happened next, we were super proud of her and that we just knew Jesus was, too.

Victoria approached the man, and held out the apple. The moment of truth had arrived. The man looked at her, and then at us. “She wanted to buy you an apple,” Lisa said. The man graciously accepted Victoria’s gift, grinned from ear to ear and took a huge bite out of the juicy, red apple. “Thank you, little girl, and God bless you.” He continued to enjoy the apple as we slowly walked away.

Our daughter had just lived out Luke 17:21 (“God’s kingdom is already among you”). She had reminded us that God is at work within, among, and through us – that we are all called to be his instruments, his hands and feet, people of the kingdom – that we are to live the way Jesus taught us to live and to love the way Jesus taught us to love – that we are to help others see, hear, taste, and experience the forgiving, loving, grace-filled Kingdom of God.
– Rev. Chris Holliday serves as the associate minister at The United Methodist Church of the Resurrection West

And finally, on this beautiful Monday, I am grateful for the way the message began yesterday, with Scott giving a personal story about ordinary experiences that are so full of “pregnant meaning.” He described those moments that I have had that are just ordinary experiences but it is clearly evident that God is present, that He wants me to take something deeper from the ordinary experience. Like the bird that greets me each morning with a song, even in the dead of winter when he has every reason to complain. Like the feelings I have in texting my daughter who had been so distant and unreachable for so long but is now so present and actively working with me to restore our relationship. Like the hymn that is in my mind all night and then I hear it in the bells coming from the church down the street, outside the apartments. Like the full feelings of joy and peace that overwhelm me as I sit back in the quiet of the morning and reflect on the blessings and grace I have been given in spite of my past disobedience. I want to be so careful to not miss the message of an ordinary experience, to appreciate it for its deeper meaning that God intends for me to hear, to be grateful and acknowledge each experience and not take them for granted.

I am grateful for the fun of Opening Day, although I am very content to enjoy it away from the ballpark, especially on this fairly chilly day in Kansas City. Opening Day makes me crave a hot dog. So, in honor of Opening Day at the K, grandchildren that fill my heart and mind, and this incredibly strong craving, please click on the link below, and enjoy your Friday:

Hot Dog Hot Dog Hot Diggity Dog

I am grateful for this morning’s little prayer that was on my desk calendar I received from Michelle.

Heavenly Father,
Thank you for the opportunity to laugh. Help me to find joy in everything that I do. Let me laugh and be cheerful, so that those around me will be blessed by my smile and my optimism. Amen. – Kim Boyce

This prayer reminds me of Uncle Charlie. I would like to be more like him.  I need to be conscious of my face and the hourly scowl that comes so naturally. My students used to tell me that I always looked unhappy, even when I wasn’t. I want to show the joy that is bubbling up inside of me at all times and be more like Charlie, which actually means becoming more Christ-like. I am grateful for Uncle Charlie and his optimism and beautiful example of joy.

I am grateful for all of the robins who are searching for worms after the rain.

I am grateful for a beautiful warm mid-day and the opportunity to step outside and enjoy it.

I am grateful for shoes that fit.

And I am grateful that I will be able to see Abbie and Tara perform tonight in their school musical, “Schoolhouse Rock.”